What shall we do with a drunken sailor...

On the road to rehab?

One questions one's parenting skills when, after a few weeks of teething hell and copious amounts of panadol, nurofen and even naturopathic teething relief liquid later, one finds one's toddler playing in her room with a syringe, telling all of her teddies to 'open' while she pretends to squirt some form of pain-relieving drug into their stitched mouths. After each one she smacks her lips and says 'yum'.... too many drugs for her lately do you think?

A day for important events

Today is an important day. Not only is it the fourth anniversary of losing my mum, but I believe today would also have been Michelle's dad's birthday (am I right Michelle??) and.... dum da da dum...... Charlotte decided to grace this important day with her first sentence. Not that we were terribly impressed under the circumstances.... 8.30pm, still faffing around awake in the lounge - high on some sugar product that was no doubt offered to her today on an outing with her grandparents (!!, no probably not, they are not the type to offer her 'bad' foods, but why she is so awake at this time of night is a mystery to us!!)... and I say "charli I think it's time for bed" and she responds with (wait for it). "no sharli stay here"...... charming. Her first sentence is a defiant stance against bed time. This does not bode well.....

Is there an off switch?

I thought it about time for my own amusement to record Charli's vocab to date. Many of the following words are contextual - if you didn't have the visual you'd have NO IDEA what the word was but I'll include them all anyway as we seem to understand her most of the time :)

Mummy (today was shortened to Mum which was all too grown up!!)
Daddy
Nanny
Betts (Aunty Bekk)
Debbi
Sharli (Charli)
Sophie (just learnt that one today... normally she just gets called....)
Puppy!!
Dog
Mouse (for any creature that has whiskers including cats and bunnies!!)
Mop or Motz (milk)
Bubbles
Bar (Bath)
Beer... we're sure she isn't saying Beer per se but can't quite figure out what it is...... today in context it might have been 'better' but we're not sure!!
Sorrwee (Sorry) - this is also a new word..... most hilariously used to apologise to anything that she may bump into including table legs and the bed head... yesterday she accidentally stepped on my foot and bent down to kiss my feet and apologised..... will lap that one up while I can!!
Tank you or Ta
Biss you (Bless you) - for when you sneeze or cough or make any similar sort of sound!!
Bir (Bird) - she still seems to have problems with the ends of words
Narna (Banana)
Apple (for apples, plums or any other fruit that is vaguely round!!)
Cheese
Sketti (Spaghetti)
Side (outside)
Wotz (walk)
Bots (books)
Box
Blocks
Baby
Zie (for Mackenzie)
Pig
Slippy (sleepy)
Wee (this can mean a multitude of things, this week it means 'weed' as we've been gardening)
Pool
Spa
Up
Wa (water)
Chair
Wheel
Key
Hot
Ow (said a lot as she frequently walks into walls!! - she may have a motor skills problem!!)
Ear
eyes (for eyes and for glasses)
Mouth (this is used to refer to Zie's dummy which she often finds not in her mouth and then wants to give her.... despite Zie not liking the dummy!!)
duck
shoes
shirt
strawberry

okay - will have to come back and edit this post each day as I keep waking up and thinking of more words... and then I realise that each day I could be adding words and I may as well just in about a year add a link to the webster's english dictionary!!!

Who'd be a parent?

well things are absolutely crazy here. No time to even wee on my own let alone blog - not that you needed to know that!! Charli has decided that sleep is unnecessary and Mackenzie has gone from nice 3-4 hour sleeps with feeds in between to 2 hourly feeds and no sleeping unless being carried by mummy!! oh and she cluster feeds usually anywhere between 4 and 10pm for about 4 hours - it's insane!! arsenic hour has taken on a whole new meaning and after shutting the doors on two screaming children last night at 7pm dave and I stood in the lounge looking at each other in shock wondering how we were supposed to cope with every night like this!!

Add to this that my boobs feel like someone has taken a piece of sandpaper to both nipples and I'm not game to look in a mirror as I don't think my hair has seen a brush in about 5 days :)
Kids - who'd have them??!! :)

I think there is just too much going on at the moment - Dave and I are still madly trying to get Charli's new room painted so Mackenzie can move into her own room (she is currently in a cot next to us and she is A NOISY SLEEPER!!). Additionally we are trying to reorganise the kitchen and there are boxes strewn all over our house and I have no idea where anything is. Toss in the fact that as of yesterday Charli I think is a bit over Mackenzie taking up so much of our attention and today dive bombed her while I was feeding Mackenzie so I ended up with two kids in my lap - the smaller of which was none too happy about the large child on top of her - it's madness I tell you.

After discovering that Mackenzie will happily sleep on my lap while I shoot the crap out of bad guys in Tomb Raider on the XBox (but will not sleep in our room where it's all quiet), we have tonight put on some 'uterus' noises courtesy of the Steelcraft Light and Sound projector given to us by Libby after the birth of Charli. This did nothing for Charlotte (sorry Lib) but Zie has now been asleep for a record time of 20 minutes in her cot and touch wood we may have found the solution to her problem - it must be noisy to sleep!!! Of course the problem now is that she is in our room so we either have to a) sleep with uterus whooshing noises or b) turn it off and have an unsettled baby...... what a choice :)

Anyway, I'm off to either crash out or lay comatose in front of the telly. I keep telling myself this will get better - preferably by the time Dave returns to work...... it will get better won't it?

Our Christmas Eve Present

Hello there,
I've promised some of you that I would post the story of Mackenzie's birth. And so I shall. I've been a little remiss in doing this for a couple of reasons. 1) Who has the time with a newborn, a toddler and 1000 things to do around the house that should have been done before the baby came (i.e. get the second bedroom done) but alas were not...... not sure why - oh yes that's right, I was finishing my PhD!!! :) and secondly, the story is short. The entire labour and birth was speedy, and hence writing about it almost seems surreal, like did it actually happen? of course I only need to step into our bedroom and view this in her cot


to remind myself that indeed it did happen. And this is how it all came about......

'twas the afternoon before Christmas and all through the house, everyone was making lots of noise and vacuuming and playing loud music and squealing and it was really pissing me off!! :)
Like a cat about to birth her kittens, all I wanted to do was lie in a dark room and be left alone - which is exactly what I was doing. I had left Dave to deal with Charli and I was lying on our bed with the curtains shut, trying in vain to block out the noise and desperately just needing everyone to go away. This in itself really should have tipped me off that things were starting to happen, but they didn't. I just thought I was being grumpy :)

I was also getting some bad back cramps quite frequently but thought nothing of it - those of you who know me know that I had been getting quite bad practice contractions for the weeks leading up to this point, so as far as I was concerned this was just one more day of that fun! i was exhausted and kept falling asleep between these back pains - would get another one, wake up, it would ease and I would drift back off to sleep. Suddenly I was awoken by that feeling of 'oh my god I just wet myself, oh no hang on that would be my waters breaking!!' (note: time 2.30pm) ..... calmly I got up and headed for the bathroom. I ran into Dave on the way and suggested that we should discuss what to do with Charlotte as my waters had just broken. His eyes widened in disbelief and he headed for the phone to call his mum. Not wanting to talk to anyone I sequestered myself in the bedroom until Mother-in-Law had collected Charli. Dave told her if nothing eventuated we'd be back to pick her up that night - it was after all Christmas Eve..... we wanted our little girl close to us for Christmas morning.

Dave kept suggesting we call our midwife or head for the hospital but the pains I was getting were weird - nothing like I'd had with Charlotte and to be honest I was still not convinced I was actually in labour. They all sat low - just under my bump - and never radiated around my entire tummy like I knew that they should. Oh and the back ache - that just never went away by this time. We tried contacting our midwife on her mobile, at the hospital and by page but all went unanswered so we assumed she was occupied with another labour or some such and I finally decided that perhaps we should just throw the bags in the car and drive up to the birth centre and just 'see what was going on' - if she said I wasn't in labour then we could just head home and pick up Charli on the way.

Well, I'd say five minutes into the car trip and contractions were BITING..... I was facing backwards in the passenger seat as sitting normally was out of the question. Just as we pull up at the hospital my phone rings and its our midwife - I tell her we're downstairs and on our way up. Strangely my contractions are still all just under my bump and the back pain was quite strong by now....... yet I was still confused about whether this was 'it'.... after all, wasn't my entire stomach meant to be contracting?

3.41 - arrive in birth centre and get blood pressure taken and take prescribed antibiotics for my heart

Midwife goes to run spa but by now I know there will be no getting in the spa. This baby is on its way, despite none of the telltale all over tummy contractions happening. All I remember at this point is the amazing pressure in my bottom and my back (too much information?). This little girl was definitely sitting low and to the back and it was not nice!!

at 4.13 I get this amazing need to push and after hollering my way through it (I was definitely screaming my head off more during this labour - think of all those bad acting scenes you've ever seen with the woman screaming - that was me - I actually wanted myself to be quiet but just could not have kept my voice lowered if I'd tried).....I announced to hubby and midwife that it was my first push. My midwife commented "wow you don't muck around do you?" I may have smiled at that point, it's hard to know. The next contraction hit with such force it knocked the breath out of me - not good really seeing as IT NEVER STOPPED. This contraction went on for well over 2 minutes and I think I nearly yelled myself hoarse. I couldn't catch my breath and I remember thinking that it felt like this baby was coming out of my bum. Not a pretty picture I know, and my fairly extensive knowledge of biology meant that I knew it wasn't coming out of there, but holy moly...... ouch.

This second push was it........ the head crowned, I yelled for Dave to grab the camera, he got one shot squeezed off (I won't traumatise you by showing you that!!) and the little mite just fell right out. The relief was immeasurable. I reached down and picked her up and there's a photo of me holding her that depicts my pure relief/joy/ecstasy felt in that moment.
Some will say that I'm lucky to have such quick labours. And I won't deny that given the option of birthing this way and being in labour for 12 hours - well I'll take the 9 minutes of pushing thanks. But I would also like to point out that birthing fast has it's interesting points. Not the least of which is that it's all very surreal. In those few minutes after the birth, with Dave holding Mackenzie and I from behind, well we looked at her and I could see my bewilderment mirrored in Dave's eyes. We had our new daughter...... nine minutes of intense screaming and here she was. It was almost too fast. There was no time to pace around having contractions preparing yourself for what was about to happen. No time for Dave to lovingly stroke my hair and hold my hands while this baby slipped in and out of the birth canal. No time for any of that. She was just there suddenly. We came home that night - against medical advice of course!! - so that we could spend Christmas Eve at home in our own bed. And even hours later, Dave unable to sleep because he was so wired, me curled up in bed watching her sleep in the cot next to our bed - even then it all seemed like it couldn't possibly have happened. Our Christmas Eve present was born in a little under 2 hours.

That's the end of Mackenzie's birth story. But I must share with you the following photo - the Christmas Day present that we gave to Charlotte - her own little baby sister - well it outdid any of the other presents we or Santa gave her. The squeals of 'baby' that resulted on presentation of Mackenzie were priceless and will ring in my ears for many years to come.



I thank the universe each and every day for the two lovely little princesses that have blessed our lives and continue to do so every waking minute of my life.

And Santa said ..... and then there were four

Hello dear readers, 'tis I, back from the land of PhD submission but probably not going to be posting any more frequently as the universe saw fit to deliver us a beautiful baby girl for Christmas this year (okay well we say she's beautiful but yes we know she looks like a monkey - just like her sister did......we're going to keep her anyway ;) ).

You all know the stats by now so I won't post them on a public forum - I'm still mildly paranoid about sharing everything bar our medicare number to the wider world. But here is a photo to satisfy Michelle's curiosity :)

It's over

It's over, it's done. I wanted to write a really inspiring post about finishing my PhD thesis, but it will have to wait. The pure exhaustion that has hit me, coupled with re-acquainting myself with have Charli all day, every day..... well needless to say that bed is summoning at 7.30pm. Add to that the fact that - despite all logic - I did not sleep well last night after submitting. I spent the night dreaming of alternate titles, and re-arranging paragraphs. Ridiculous really. Still, the unconcious is not always a logical creature. If only I weren't pregnant a sleeping tablet would be downed tonight in the hopes of a dream-free sleep. But 'tis not to be. And speaking of baby - COME OUT NOW!! You have permission and I've had enough ....

Final days of writing causes stroke in young female...

Seriously, if I had to continue on functioning at this level of stress for much longer than the 3 days that I have left until I submit, I think I would give myself a coronary. At my last ante-natal appointment, my blood pressure was normal - which means high for me because during pregnancy my BP is usually low (well when I say usually of course I am basing this on the ONE previous pregnancy that I have had LOL). So with any luck by next Wednesday, when I have my 37 week preggo check-up, I will back to my usual fainting-episode level of blood pressure. :)

Thanks everyone for your support in these final days.... it is very much appreciated. Don't think there won't be the bash of the year when this thesis is finally confered.... I'm not even waiting until graduation, the party will probably be about one week after I get the Dean's letter.....

The Homeward Stretch

Well dear readers, while there are still six sleeps to go until I go to the printers with my thesis in my hot little hands, finally there is a light at the end of the tunnel. My supervisor has now seen my final chapter and actually uttered the words "well done" and only made the most minor of changes - most of them grammatical. I truly can't believe it. Of course Chapter Three is still dogging me (I keep having to stop myself from doing a complete re-write), and there are a gazillion formatting changes to be made..... but hey, I've still got six sleeps to go right?

Best go. Who knows, I could get most of it done by the weekend and actually give my darling hubby some time off...... but I can't promise anything, sorry hon :)

7 more sleeps.... should I be this calm?

I've discovered my Zen side. I got bugger all done on the weekend. Some of it due to fatigue and writer's block. Some of it to do with Charli disobeying me and cutting three teeth inside 48 hours one week before my PhD is due. So she was a little wretched on the weekend to say the least. And while poor Dave tried his best, she's a bit of a mummy's girl when she's grumpy. Aren't we all?

So I tried to just 'go with it'. Spent some time in the spa with her - which sounds like it should be relaxing but if you've ever seen a toddler in the water when they're having a good time, you'll know what I mean when I say 'not so much...'. Dave's rum and coke inevitably ends up as half rum and coke, half bromide and chlorinated water!! My glasses become so that I need little windscreen wipers on them. Still, it stops her screaming for a short time so that is always nice.

And as for the other little bump inside me.... well she has 'dropped' which means no more reflux and heartburn which is nice...... BUT that little bit of fun has been replaced by what I can only describe as trampolining on a floor of nerves. She's found this one nerve that when she touches it, well sorry to be so graphic but it feels like one foot is already out - you know, just testing the air temperature. So while Charli woke twice last night, it really didn't even bother me - I was up every 1.5 hours anyway, so uncomfortable that lying still for any longer than that would require me to have been given some form of narcotic.

So there you go. One can't imagine why I feel so calm right now but I do. Anyway, this was just a short break - back to finish the last 2 or so pages of my FINAL CHAPTER. Then begins a week of revisions, proof-reading, making up (I mean finding) references, and generally ensuring that this thesis doesn't look like something the cat dragged in.

See you all soon

9 ....

Nine days and counting people..... it's being submitted to the printers on Monday 4th December. there is no question of 'will it be done?'.... whatever is done by the 4th is being submitted.

My midwife informs me that although my belly has dropped and baby is head down, it is not yet engaged.... so I still have time up my sleeve. Cross fingers and toes.

14 .....

Aargh!!

17 sleeps until submission!

Geek in the making

Pick the daughter of the IT geek

68, 130 words ..... and a bucket load of tears later...

Well it's been an interesting couple of days. Because the best combination in the world is a heavily pregnant lady, a thesis-submission date looming a mere 8 weeks away, and a toddler who has learnt to throw herself on the floor and scream at the mere mention of the word 'no' from her parents. It's a wonder Dave bothers to come home from work at all anymore. I suspect that no amount of server problems or email crashing or IT-user complaints could anywhere near rival the state of utter chaos that has become our lives. Or maybe I'm exaggerating a little - those pregnancy hormones are likely to do that to you.

but anyway, having said all that, note the word count..... not that that is any indication of how near to completion I am... I still don't know the answer to that one. I do know that I'm still running analyses (something I did not expect to still be doing at this stage), I still have a host of formatting problems to fix, and I suspect that there is still a mountain of interpretation of results I have yet to do... and the best time to try and make insightful, brilliant conclusions - why when you are 36 weeks pregnant of course!! *sigh*

Wa paise

..... or water please if you're speaking charli-speak. After reading my online parent group discussions about what other bubs Charlotte's age are saying, I thought it high time that I jot down all the words she's saying - not because I think anyone but Dave and I are interested, but because this has become the place that I jot down these things so that years from now, I have some recollection of how my kids developed... that and I can't look at my thesis tonight so this seemed like a good alternative.

(in no particular order)

Dad-da, daddy, dad

Mummy, mum
(but only if asked to say it or when cranky and/or upset)... unlike the word 'Daddy'
that gets squealed with pleasure as the car pulls into the driveway *sigh*

Wa - Water

Du(ck) - she has a tendency to drop the ends of her words so context is everything

Do(g)

Boat

I love you
(however, only the 'I' is verbalised, then she signs Love by crossing her arms over her chest and then pointing to one of us while saying "do" (you) This sound actually means you in German so I brag that she's already bi-lingual!!). I would also add that I'm not sure she understands the meaning of this yet, she performs it more for our amusement... as she does for most things I think... :)

Sheese (cheese)

Ba/Bar (Bath)

Paise (as mentioned this is please)

Ta
(as in Thank You - said incredibly exaggeratedly and while tipping her head cutely to the side so that we cannot deny her whatever it is she's begging for at the time!!)

Ta-ta or Bye-bye
(this is usually after running to me while I'm in bed, kissing me perfunctorily and then heading for the door at a run when her Nan turns up to pick her up in the morning... glad to see I'm missed!!)

Mwa
(as in the kissing noise when you blow a kiss - this is accompanied by slamming her palm into her mouth and then pulling it away as she 'blows' you a kiss)

She's beginning to do 'woof woof' and 'book book' (this is mummy's pathetic attempt at a chicken noise..) - we have chickens next door.....

There feels like there should be more than that - probably because she does actually spend most of the day 'talking'.... to me, to the teddy, to the phone, to any object (animate or inanimate) that will listen to her with some degree of interest.... it never stops. I really don't know where she gets it from .......

Not to stereotype but.......

...... ten points to the first person to guess the demographic of the people who live next door. I have been writing a PhD to the tunes of Kylie Minogue for four days now. I don't dislike her music but I'm not a raving fan either .... but guaranteed that by December I'll know most of the lyrics by heart.

I needed a boost so I cheated....

Okay - well I've just printed out EVERYTHING that I've written for my PhD so far - even if it isn't all edited and pretty yet - because I've just hit one of those walls of frustration that is liable to end up in tears soon. I think a trip to the pool with the little monkey may be in order this afternoon, because when you get to the point where you can't string 3 words together and a misplaced comma ends in tears.... well it's time to take a step back and re-group I think. I'm still on target with my timelines though so all should be okay.

Some of you will have received a panicky email about 1/2 hour ago about how to deal with one of my table of contents problems......I tried Word help. But has anyone else ever noticed that it's not very helpful at all? Though Dave has pointed out to me that I am pushing the limits of Word's capabilities with this thesis. Like how do you get your margins to mirror consistently (with one margin bigger than the other for binding purposes) when you switch between sections with some pages portrait and others landscape? And is this really a problem I thought I would ever need to deal with in life? So if any of you consider yourselves to be Word gurus and did not in fact get my email awhile ago - please feel free to let me know and I'll include you in any further pleas for help!!

Cheers.

Random musings

Just a few thoughts to share. Realised that I had not shown pics of the gorgeous flowers I got from Dave on our wedding anniversary.

If I hadn't mentioned it, the theme of the fourth wedding anniversary is flowers or fruit. You have to be fairly creative if you're buying for my husband then because I can only imagine the look on his face if I'd presented him with flowers or a basket of seasonal produce...... so this is what he ended up with.....



And so as not to be left out - this is what his daughter will be wearing this spring :)



On another note, our daughter has taken to kicking the wall for a good half an hour before she will finally give up the ghost and go to sleep - this is day and night sleeps so not quite sure what's going on here unless she's been sneaking sips of mummy's caffeinated drinks while she's not looking. Anyway, today she finally went to sleep - but notice the foot poised and ready for when she wakes up and wants to let me know she's finished her nap!!! ... MUMMY UP NOW PLEASE!!! (thump thump thump).