Blogging drought record?

It would have to come close to being mine I think. Some may wonder if nothing has been going on and hence I have no reason to blog....when in fact the opposite is true. In reality I have found life so overwhelmingly busy and stressful of late that the thought of in some way capturing it in word form seems all too hard.

And yet so much has happened - much of which has been posted on others' websites (Shaz and Michelle namely) who were good enough to post about our holidays and Zie's party (or did I wrongly give credit to Michelle - was that all Shaz's doing??? oh well ;) ).

PhD is still under revision..... don't ask... does anyone remember me saying about this time last year "well at least I'll have my PhD by 2007?"... well think again... but 2008 is a sure thing.... I hope...... :)

Charli continues to astound me with her humour, her conversational ability, her cheek and her tantrums... not necessarily in that order. What terrifies me most is her ability to parrot me...
(overheard while playing with her dolls in the dollhouse)

Channy is speaking with Dora "Hi Dora"
Dora: Hi Channy
(catty comes up behind Channy and says "hi channy"
Channy swiftly turns around and says "Not now I'm talking, just wait".....

*sigh*.... perhaps I should learn to speak a bit more calmly when she interrupts me ...

She plays for hours with her dolls and makes up entire scenarios that just astound me. She talks my ears off most days and by the end of the day I could gladly put cotton wool in my ears and submerge under some water just to get some peace and quiet...... and I wouldn't swap her for the world ;)

Zie.... wow. where do i start. Today she clapped for the first time, she has 2 teeth - both of which have caused her only mild distress, she continues to refuse to be fed and must feed herself everything - which leaves me scrambling to make all her food 'finger food'.... try that with weet-bix people... it's a challenge. She has been pulling to standing for weeks now and in the last 48 hours is 'walking' while you hold both hands. She is cheeky and funny and she makes me laugh a lot.

Oh and after months of hearing me whinge and whine about how our house is too small for the four of us - and after months of too-ing and fro-ing about selling versus buying versus building versus packing up our entire lives and just moving to the sub-continent.... we have finally arrived at a decision to rent out our house and go and rent a larger house somewhere..... until we can decide whether to renovate this house, knock it down and re-build or sell and build elsewhere. This decision alone could take us years ;) In the meantime, I believe there is a house soon to be available for rent ???? :) stay tuned for updates.

This does not begin to update my life. But it will have to do..... and it's better than nothing.... Now I will return to my PhD-revising, packing-up-and-moving, slowly-going-mental-as-a-mother-of-two-small-girls life and let you get back to yours.

Ciao

Full stop. The end.

Well sorry Beck, but I just had to steal your title - it seems so fitting at this point. Today I left my job. I had my farewell lunch, pocketed my Ella Bache gift voucher (thanks guys ;)) and I got in my car and came home. Granted I had celebratory drinks with a friend planned but those plans went a little pear-shaped so I came home instead. of course on the way I stopped and bought many dollars worth of new skin care, make up, and tanning lotions and hair colours.... all in the name of retail therapy you understand (despite being happy to leave my current job I still felt a little lost nonetheless) - and when I told the lady chemist that I'd just left my job - she threw in heaps more make up for free (or perhaps because I'd just spent enough money to pay the rent on their premises for another month, who knows).

Nonetheless, my days at Company X are over. Four and half years of my life with quite frankly, not as much to show for it as I would have hoped - however, many wonderful and beautiful friendships were forged, and isn't that - at the end of the day - much more important than getting published in international journals? I think I need to remind myself of that a little more. Remind myself that it's just a job and that while it needs to be rewarding so that I have the motivation to turn up each day - my life when I die should not be measured by the number of publications I received in high impact journals. I want to be remembered for the friendships I forged, for my generous spirit (which I feel has been sadly lacking lately as I've allowed myself to become bogged down in the drudgery of life), for my laughter and my ability to make friends feel good about themselves. I want to be remembered for being a mum who knows how to laugh rather than screech at her kids for getting water on the floor. I want to be remembered as a loving wife and not one who has forgotten how to laugh off the things that really don't matter. For this reason and many more, I'm excited about my move to leave Company X. It is time for a fresh start. While the decision to leave was not my own (my contract was not to be renewed but I'm not going to dwell on that un-pleasantness), the decision to resign immediately rather than wait until I had no job to go to, the decision to leave with a smile on my face and take up a new position elsewhere - these were my decisions and ones that I'm glad that I made.

So despite my blogging drought I hope to blog a little more lately. My darling Mackenzie is growing so fast and Charlotte is, as ever, a little personable being filled with questions and answers. Next blog will be devoted to them - the angels in my life for whom I am constantly grateful, and who deserve a mummy who is happy with herself. New Year's Resolution (made early because why wait until January when a fresh start is happening right now): to live life to the fullest, enjoy family and friends, and learn to laugh off those things (and people) in life that are just not worth giving yourself an ulcer about.

Isn't it ironic.

You know that song by Alanis Morisette? That feels a little like my life lately. I especially draw your attention to the bridge section of the song that goes like this:

Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face

Sneaking up on me when I think everything's going right huh? More like ambushing me from a really high place and taking a crap all over me more like it. I'm trying to figure out who I've wronged as I have some major bad karma happening at the moment. Allow me to elaborate.

The Kitchen Debacle

A few weeks ago on a Friday morning I leave to take the girls to the playcentre and meet up with some friends and their kids ...... I return at about lunchtime with toddler and baby both asleep having not had lunch (always poor planning on my part because it means a short nap because they wake hungry) - to discover a veritable waterfall coming from our kitchen ceiling. I stand there dumbfounded - unable to quite believe what I'm seeing and not quite comprehending where the water is coming from given the drought. I then realise the solar hot water system must have shat itself.
Meanwhile our optusnet connection is out and I'm left wondering how to look up plumbers' numbers as in my de-cluttering phase I threw out hard copies of all the phone books. At this stage I've called Dave's mobile and work numbers about 10 times but he's not answering. Charli wakes screaming and I'm nearly in tears. The kitchen by this time is flooded and I can't quite figure out what to try and save first.

I finally think to look through the local paper that had been delivered the previous day and find myself a plumber who can come out ASAP. Scott rocks up about 3pm that afternoon and by the time Dave gets home he's ascertained that rats (yuck!) have eaten threw the piping and he's been unable to find a replacement piece of pipe (our local tradelink didn't stock it) - so he clamped it and was able to turn the water back on and said he'd be back next week with the part to fix it properly..... right, so we set about cleaning up. Takeout for dinner.

The following morning, Dave wakes me at 7am (much to my horror because it was meant to be my sleep in day) - and says we have a problem. I can hear water falling in the kitchen again and my heart sinks. Clearly (so we thought) - Scott's stop gap measure did not work. So I take the girls up to a friend's house for an early breakfast as the kitchen is unuseable, appliances such as the jug and kettle were saturated so I couldn't even boil water for Zie's breakfast and it was all just too hard trying to explain to Charli that she couldn't play in the disgusting water falling from the ceiling. Dave stays to call the plumber.

Mother-in-law comes to get Charli about 11am and the plumber also turns up. Turns out the rats waited until the plumber left and ATE SOME MORE HOLES... so his fix was fine - it's just more rats ate more holes. He fixes that pipe, turns the water back on, finds another leak and so on and so forth.......
Connie leaves with Charli, Dave and I set about letting everything dry and then start cleaning up. Just as I'm thinking of going to get Charli, water starts falling from the ceiling again (you've got to be freaking kidding me right? I hear you say...). Call the plumber who comes out (at this point I was in total denial about just how big his bill was going to be)..... and he has to set up some temporary piping OUTSIDE the house so that if rats eat through it at least it won't drip through the ceiling. Meanwhile, the insurance won't cover any of the plumbing costs - only the water damage.

Life 1 : Carla 0

The PhD - The Jury is back in

As for my PhD, the news is not good really. I'm still feeling really raw about the whole thing and quite in shock. Reviewer A, while making some comments regarding how it could be bettered when I publish (which he encouraged me to do), pretty much used the terms "an important contribution to the field", "addresses gaps in the current literature in this field" and ticked the box recommending me for a Dean's commendation. Exciting huh? Great ego boost? Well wait there's more.... and unfortunately it is not a free set of steak knives.

Reviewer B, in a nutshell, thought it was not worthy of a PhD standard, ticked "revise and resubmit" and seems to have some bee in his bonnet about the fact that I didn't do any independent research or data collection (I did all of this myself, data collection, conceptualisation, everything - so I'm not sure where he got that idea). So it had to go to an adjudicator, who has been a gem about the whole thing (I was pretty much in tears of despair on his shoulder having decided that if I had to do a major revise and resubmit I was quitting.....) and has said that while I have to write a letter addressing each of this examiner's comments, I don't have to necesarily take on board all of the comments, nor do I have to go through the examination process again - as long as the adjudicator signs off on my response letter.

Everyone keeps saying - "oh well that's good, not as bad as it could be then?". But really, it doesn't really feel great either. It's all just a bit of a nightmare really - 9 months after submission and it's still not looking like I'll graduate this year either.... I'm over the entire thing and not even sure what I want to do with my life. I keep telling myself once I get the PhD out of the way I can focus on a career direction...... but I don't even have a future at my current place of employment, which brings me to my next point.....

running score: Life 2: Carla 0

I'm sorry - do you work here?

I had big plans for 2008 work-wise. I was thinking about increasing my days to 3 per week. I was going to ask for funding to present a paper in Bondi in February next year... and quite frankly if it wasn't in the budget I was going anyway. Professional development (aka tax write-off) and all that.......I was going to network my arse off and perhaps make some connections for the future.

However, as of Tuesday last week, I've been told that I don't have a job past the end of the year as no part-time positions are being accommodated for in the current budget plans. So I've pretty much just been told to start looking for work elsewhere - really fits in with the 'family friendly' award they just won doesn't it? The bit I really don't get is how much I've been pushed to finish my PhD over the last 2 years and then they also grant me leave of absence for 4 months last year so I could complete it - right before I also had to take 6 months off to have a baby. And now I'm back on board with no more babies in our future and thus no more leave of absences from work..... committed to staying with them and they decide this is the time to say 'adios'? It makes no sense.

Life 3: Carla 0

But then - well sometimes life just hands you one. Yesterday after much deliberating about when we were going to put the girls in the one bedroom, we decided to take the plunge. There were many reasons for us wanting them to be in the one room.....and Charli's obvious reason of it will be easier to boss Mackenzie around if she's close by ALL THE TIME. But mostly it's really hot in the front room and from memory, Charli (when she was in that room) didn't sleep for about the 6 months that is summer here in Queensland. What possessed me to all of a sudden yesterday declare that THIS was the day it should happen I'll never know. Maybe it was because, let's face it, in four days we leave on a weekend away WITH NO KIDS. And I figured that if the first four days didn't go well, at least I'd have 2 days to recover and re-group before coming home to more pain.

My biggest concern of course was NEITHER of them ever sleeping. It took us close to two years to get Charli to sleep through - and with Zie still MONTHS off finishing teething (given she hasn't even sprouted one yet... well I could envisage much pain ahead of us with Zie waking Charli and Charli waking Zie and so on and so forth....

But you know what? Last night FOR THE FIRST TIME IN ...... OH ...... EVER Zie slept from 6pm til 4am (for a quick feed) and then through til 6am. Charli did not wake up at the 4am feed. When Zie woke at 6am, Charli still looked tired so Dave suggested she go back to sleep AND SHE DID for another hour. Meanwhile, let me re-iterate - Zie slept for 10 hours without needing my attention. Sure, I heard her wake about 4 times during the night and cry out - but obviously the snoring emanating from the nearby bed was comfort enough and I was allowed to spend a straight 6 hours without leaving my bed.

So there you go. Sometimes life just kicks you while you're down. Other times it just hands you one on a plate. Now the cynic in me might suggest that life is just building me up for another fall. But hey, I'm not the cynical type. Right guys? Guys??


Life 3: Carla 1 (and committed to evening the score)

A change is as good as a holiday...so they say.

Well I don't know about that... I think I would rather a holiday. This didn't quite work out the colour that Dave and I expected.... still, it will make a nice change not having to touch up my roots every 3 minutes!! My hair grows so fast since I've had kids.

Sprung

Dave walks into the lounge room to find Charli - having gone through the drawer with all of our electronic equipment including old mobile phones - with a mobile plastered to her ear, yammering away to someone.

Dave: Charli, what are you doing? (sternly as she isn't meant to go into that drawer)

Charli: (looks up in surprise, turns back to the phone and whispers...) I'll call you back. (throws the phone back in the drawer and turns back to Dave with a 'butter wouldn't melt in my mouth' look.

Dave (leaves the room in stitches).

She may as well just have been born 14 years old....

28 months later ...

Dear Charli girl,
Darling girl, today you turned 28 months old and you are growing up too fast. Life with you of late has been interesting to say the least. About a week ago you turned into adorable girl, the weeks leading up to that.... well let me just say that you have a temper on you when you choose to :)

You and I took Zie on her first beach holiday to Marcoola with Meegan and Owen and it was a delightful weekend. You are such a little caregiver and you are alway looking out for others and especially love looking after your little sister. I try not to encourage too much caregiving behaviour as I don't want you to feel too much responsibility at the tender age of 2 - but your caring nature comes naturally and you are quick with a hug and a kiss when Zie (or sometimes Mummy!) is crying.

It turns out you are quite the cook and this morning you made scones for Aunty Bekk and Matt (aka Map - I think you truly think he is Map from Dora Spora). I tried to help with the scones but you insisted on doing most of it yourself - while they did resemble scones that had in fact exploded, they were very tasty and at this rate I may just hang up my apron and allow you to take over cooking duties soon.

You have discovered the art of procrastination - and the favourite is to ask for endless cuddles and kisses when your Daddy and I are trying to coax you to go to sleep. It's difficult to get cranky at you when you use this ploy - how does one get cranky when you look up at me and say "more kisses mummy?"...... You really do know how to play the game quite well though - and it scares me that you are quite good at it at 2. Your favourite is to push all my buttons, totally rile me up, then goad me even further by patting me patronisingly and saying "it's alright mummy" when I'm going cranky at you for doing something you are not meant to. Just as I think my eyeball is going to explode from the stress of parenting such an independent and strong-willed little girl, you put your arms around my neck, say "I lub you mummy" and ask if we can do 'bu-fly kisses'....... how can I compete with that?

You love your food and I thank the universe each and every day for this as I don't think I have the patience for a fussy eater. We are still waiting for those 2 year old molars to come through - I suspect they are waiting for me to have a really important week at work or something and then they will make their appearance - giving us no sleep or peace for about 2 weeks on end.

Darling girl, we love you - but I must dash now and end this letter as there is ironing to be done, dinner to prepare and a mountain of other things that I must do before you wake from your nap. As much as you love to help me with all of these things, it truly is best if you don't ;)

All my love,
Mummy
xoxo

Where has the time gone my darling....

Dear Mackenzie Grace,
It is hard to believe that nearly 8 months ago you blessed our lives with your smiles. And you truly are our smiley girl. Even in the midst of tears, when your tummy hurts or I'm just taking way too long to get food to you, you always have a smile for us. And speaking of food, don't you just love it? From the moment it was introduced to you about 2.5 months ago, you took to eating like a duck to water. With a couple of tongue thrusts you soon learnt that you were wasting precious food doing that and soon learnt to just devour anything in sight. Some have commented that you seem ready for a good old steak with a side of vegetables and they are not far wrong. Granted, we should probably puree the meat, but there are some days when you seem to be having a growth spurt when I suspect that you would make light work of a T-bone steak despite not having any chompers just yet.


You are now sitting quite well, though your desperation to reach objects just out of your grasp sometimes means that you fall flat on your face with your legs still out in front of you. This makes me wince as it's been years since I've had that level of flexibility - I suspect if I tried that now my child-bearing hips may just simply crack into two piece. But you just roll over and keep trying to get hold of whatever it was that took your fancy in the first place - usually with a giggle or two along the way.

And giggle - your sister and you are a right royal pair when you get going. Charli's favourite pastime when it comes to playing with you is the take the edge of the fisher price swing and swing you as high as it will go - or alternatively bounce you in your bouncing car until I suspect that the mountains of food you just devoured are about to erupt like Mt Vesuvius. The first time I caught her doing this I just about died of fright - but it's difficult to tell her that she shouldn't do it because you don't like it when - right in front of me - you make a liar of me and giggle at Charli while giving this look that says "don't listen to Mum, I'm having a marvellous time". Charli turns to me and says "Zie likes it"..... how to argue with that. The two of you run rings around your father and I already ...... it's frightening.

You love to sing (i.e. squeal really loudly) - and love to be sung to - by your sister of course - not me or your father. She loves to sing you "Dora Spora (Explorer)" and she's no doubt already planting the dora obsession into your pretty little head - which is probably just as well because it's plainly obvious that you are going to be forced to watch hours of Dora Spora as the years go by. Still if this relieves me of Dora watching duties then sorry babe, but I'm all for it.

While you are not yet crawling yet, you may as well be. I cannot leave you for a second - the other day I dared to go and pee for 2 seconds while you were on the floor and on my return you were under the coffee table. Not at all bothered by this fact, you just giggled when I had to get down on hands and knees and drag you out.

Zie you have brought us such delight over the past months and you are such a placid easy-going little girl. Your Dad and I look forward to the coming months of crawling, learning to walk and those first delightful words that will come out of your mouth - and I don't mean the vocalisation of dada that your Daddy claims was his name but really we both just know it's the first thing that ALL babies say - but we'll let him enjoy that moment ;)

Love Mummy
x

A mirror image of my life

for those of you who don't already read her blog - this woman's life could be a mirror image of my own at the moment.

Mummy meltdown

Well it finally happened. That day that was bound to happen when everything just hit me. That day was yesterday. Out of the blue. Like these moments usually do - to catch you off guard. I had Owen's second birthday party to be at by 2pm at Wynnum. 2pm. I mean it's not like it was first thing in the morning. However I had been awake most of the night with a little Zie who has decided that she must be fed every 1.5-2hours and it's killing me. Add that to the fact that it's been going on for a few nights so I was sleep deprived, Dave starts his new job soon and I know that as wonderful as that is it is going to be a stressful transition, I didn't get the job I want so I have to return to my job in 8 days (and counting), Charli is being an inquisitive 2-year old - constantly asking questions and back chatting us, Mum's birthday was on Thursday (she would have been 60)...... well it all just added up to a day when everything just went BLAAAAH. Suddenly this weight just hit me. The thought of trying to get Charli and Zie both fed lunch and dressed, and me dressed (I was still in my pjs at 11am).......it's hard to explain to anyone who has never had 2 kids and been sleep deprived - and by anyone, I mean you have to be the mummy. Because I'm still not convinced that any man has half a clue as to how hard this all is.... I'm sorry that sounds sexist but it's just the way it is.

Anyway, so the breaking point was my lovely little Zie would not stop rolling and I couldn't get her pants on her.... and bam. I am curled up on the bed next to my naked baby crying and sobbing and wondering just how easy it would be to hurt one of them. It's hard to admit that here on a public forum, but I'm going to.... because I think that people are all too quick to gloss over the hardships of parenthood sometimes. I mean, I would never have comprehended how someone could possibly even consider harming their children - before I had kids and hadn't slept properly in over a week. Then the reality was all too close to home.

Then the real kicker. The event to really make me feel guilty as hell for being human and crying? Darling two-year old Charli, inquisitive and caring, comes in, gets up on the bed, starts patting me and questioning "what's wrong mummy? you sad? it's okay."..... over and over and over again. I tried to smile through the tears. Tried to tell myself that no small child should have to see their mummy totally lose it on a Saturday afternoon when in reality we were meant to be going to a party. So I dragged myself out of bed and got dressed and we went to the party. It's a blur. Charli seemed to have a good time - and a big thank you to Shaz who spent most of the afternoon running around after her as I just didn't have the energy.

Anyway, driving home in a daze (Sharon informs me they were driving next to me the whole way home with the girls waving at me from their car and I didn't even notice them) hubby texts and says he's spoken to Mother-in-Law and Charli can stay there for the night. So feeling guilty again I drop her over there and she is now staying there until Monday morning. We had another bad night with Zie and I am at a loss as to how to deal with it. Please no suggestions. We've tried them all. I'm not going down the path of controlled crying. I don't feel comfortable co-sleeping with her (I'm not opposed to it I just am so dog tired that I'm not game to), we will be trying the heater tonight, hubby tried giving her formula through the night to give me a break but she screamed for 45 minutes before he was forced to come in and reluctantly wake me to feed her, she's been wrapped, not wrapped, cuddled, burped, she's not in pain as she immediately falls asleep as soon as she comes in to bed with me and takes one suck of my boob... *sigh*..... she just wants her mummy and mummy desperately needs some alone sleep time. This time shall pass. And I'll look back and wonder where the time went. But right now the immediate future seems bleak and sleep deprived and tiring.

Parenthood - who'd do it right? I would. All over again. But just let me say "FUCK". Sometimes it's hard.

A lot to answer for....

My PhD examiner who never returned my PhD report that is. Why? I just lost out to another candidate for a postdoctoral position that I really really really wanted. Why? Because this other candidate had their PhD already and yours truly does not. Otherwise I was an exceptional candidate for the job, 'very employable', good experience, fantastic project management skills... blah blah blah. It was actually hard to hear all the positive praise but then still be told I was unsuccessful. Oh well, what's the Zen response to all of this? Perhaps it is best that Dave and I are not both starting new jobs at the same time........ as he was successful in securing a new role that starts next Thursday - yay for hubby.

Library opening hours

After having read Meegan's blog regarding having no books to read that haven't been read 1000 times before - and then having a couple of other people respond in the positive to my comment about borrowing books from me - well it occurs to me that we need to organise some sort of book library/swap amongst us all. No reason as far as I can see either, why people interstate should not be able to join us in this. Some of my books I will want back. Others can just continue on in the great book swap of life. So I'm not sure how to get started with this. Do I list some of my top 10 most owned authors? Do I let you all know the genre I like and see if it's up your alley? Suggestions are most welcome regarding how we can expand our reading potential without having to fork out $29.95 for a book that takes me 48 hours to read (edit. well they used to only take me that long to read. Now thanks to two children and being able to usually only read about 2 pages uninterrupted, it does tend to take a little longer to complete a novel these days).

Childhood memories

Hello dear readers,
Today I am ordering books from Amazon.com....... I am trying to find all of those wonderful books that I remember from my childhood. And we're ordering them for our kids...

Lowly worm books by Richard Scarry
Where the wild things are
Enid Blyton's the Magic Faraway Tree series
Raggedy Ann's Cooking School (I have this on tape with my mum reading it to me :))

So in an attempt to cut down on shipping costs - if anyone in Brisbane would like to order any books for their little ones - special books that they remember from their childhoods... let me know.

Miscellaneous memories

• Mackenzie played peekaboo with me the other night after her bath. Pulling the towel she was wrapped in over her face and then pulling it down and belly-laughing as I yelled 'boo' repeatedly for about 5 minutes

• Today while making breakfast a glass cutting board fell onto the bench and I waited with bated breath for it to shatter while exclaiming "SHIT".... Suddenly from behind me I hear "shit" from my two-year old. I turn horrified - sure that it was Dave who was going to be the first to corrupt her ever-burgeoning vocabulary.... but no. " No charli, mummy said 'shoot' like we 'shoot' with your toy cap gun, you know? shoot" "no mummy, shit" she exclaims. I sigh. I turn and resume pouring milk over cereal, intent on the task of ignoring her expletives, fervently praying that she will not still be chanting 'shit' in 2 hours when we go over to my parents-in-law. I look at her sideways, trying to see whether she will say it again. She eyes me back sternly and proclaims "you mummy, naughty".... I leave the room laughing

• My face being spattered with rather saliva-ry sweet potato as Zie, after tasting her first mouthful of food, rolls it around her tongue until the food is good and truly wet and then blows a raspberry at me, right as I lean in to ask "do you like it?"..... she found it rather funny to say the least. My two baby girls - a laugh a bloody minute :)

• Me going into charli's room after a ten minute session of yelling when she is meant to be sleeping only to have her say 'charli (a)wake mummy - park?'..... I've learnt my lesson about saying "when you wake up we'll go to the park"... sigh. Literal bloody beings aren't they?

• Zie's first 'words' - dada - at the tender age of 5 months....... just like her sister. I already envision a future in which Dave and I have to have earplugs surgically inserted into our ears to prevent them from bleeding - being exposed to 2 little girls aged 2 and 4 who talk from sun-up to sundown - enough to make anyone's ears bleed..... it's lucky that sometimes it's nice things like "I lub you mummy" - the new one from charli.

• And finally today, all dressed up to go to lunch - just in jeans and a tanktop but looking rather slim and hot if I do say so myself ;) charli declares me 'pretty', races for her toy camera and says "picture you mummy? cheese!!" And its moments like that that make it all worth it people :)
  

About the day I used up the previous 24 hours of rain

Well at least dear readers, that is how it felt in my moment of guilt lying there under my vichy shower, enjoying my 90 minutes of pampering at Mummabubba. Mummabubba is a day spa for mummies - "makes proud mothers into beautiful mothers" is their motto - and while I don't think I came out any more beautiful - my god did I come out feeling rejuvenated. I had the mineral wrap body rejuvenator. Start off with someone giving your tired winter skin a good rubbing over with a sea salt scrub. Then this is washed off with a vichy shower - a shower head that is so aerated it feels like silk being poured over your skin...... then a mineral mud pack was lathered over my entire body and the lid of the 'bed' I was lying on was closed. this bed had multiple water jets both under my body and above and suddenly my entire being was being massaged with these jets of water. While I will admit that the jets of water to my feet was reminiscent of some form of WWII water torture (okay so I'm not keen on foot massages either) - the rest of it was heavenly (and I learnt later that I could have asked for the foot bit to be turned off so I know that for next time!!). Meanwhile, while being massaged with warm water jets, the inside of this vichy shower bed was also filling with steam - in essence it was like being in a sauna and spa at the same time. Oh and did I mention that during this 24 minutes of water heaven, my lovely consultant was giving me a scalp massage? Really, wine and steak on Monday, Vichy shower rejuvenation on Thursday... I'm not sure I've had a week like this in ......oh I don't know - since about pre-July 2004 when i first got myself knocked up and all this fun of parenthood began ;)

My goal for the rest of the year? To visit this divine kingdom of mother pampering at least once a month. Stay tuned to see if it happens.....

Why today was a good day.

1. I went to work on my own - without the girls - solo..... to discuss some handover issues with the person who has been doing my job.

2. Mackenzie's first time without me went exceptionally well, she drank from a cup, she fed from a spoon, she slept well. the only downside? I discovered just how much milk I'm going to have to milk from myself to keep her fed for one entire work day. Lord!!!

3. On my return home, both girls have fallen fast asleep allowing me to get on with writing a job application for a postdoctoral position I want to apply for (oh and to update my blog ;)

4. Super A-mart called to let me know that our couch - which was an expected 3-6 weeks away - can be delivered tomorrow. I'm not going to tell Dave this, I'm going to let it be a surprise for when he gets home. Of course, if he reads this it won't be a surprise but I think he bored of my blog weeks ago......

5. And last but not least, while doing handover we decided to go to lunch (after my phone call to my mother-in-law confirmed that all was well with the small people) - and I got to eat a steak, on my own, solo - without a baby at my boob or a toddler poking her fingers in my food to check whether or not it was hot. And I drank a glass of red wine. Steak and wine and no kids. I swear it doesn't get better than this. Having kids has made me - if nothing else - appreciate the small things in life - you know, like being able to pee without a running commentary from a 2-year old ;)

Roly poly girl

Well, my little second born muffin has one up on her sister in the smart stakes :) Not only is she rolling a month earlier than Charli ever did, but she realises that she can sleep on her tummy - something that caused Charli great distress when she first learnt to roll

Dreamworld!

Well as Sharon and Meegan have already mentioned - last Friday was a day at Dreamworld for a group of (insane) mothers and our (even more insane) children......personally Charli, Zie and I made it as far as Yatala before I had to stop before I either killed Charli or myself..... she wanted out, I need to pee.... it was a recipe for a not so calm car trip..... we were running a bit early so we stopped..

We decided to skip the Wiggles concert - I took one look at the crowds and just couldn't bear it. Here are some photos.




All in all a superb day - as far as it can be with two small kids at a theme park... I am working on making Charli my 'rides' partner (dave doesn't like them) - we rode the carousel twice, that chair ride on chains that swings out (?) she loved it!!! squealed and hung on for dear life... :) we went on the big red car and dorothy's tea cups - round and round and round until Mummy thought she would throw up LOL.... but you know what really made the day worthwhile.....??? ... tucking her into bed that night, she was a little crazy and it took a while to calm her down ;) she put her arms around me and FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME said "I lub you".... :) now if that doesn't make it all worthwhile I don't know what does

......however, here I am two days later - incredibly sleep deprived thanks to a baby who has taken 48 hours to stop being wired from the Dreamworld experience (picture trying to feed Zie under an umbrella in Wiggles World while songs by Anthony, Greg, Murray and Jeff blared out from a loudspeaker.....I don't think Zie blinked for about 24 hours she was so wired!!). Also thanks to Charli I've been awake since 4am. I've got my money on those nasty two-year old molars coming through. For her sake it better be teeth. If this is some permanent behaviour that is manifesting we are in deep trouble. She wakes up bouncing and running around the living room like a chimpanzee doped up on speed and she doesn't stop moving and talking until we wrestle her into bed around 1pm for a nap... if we're lucky.

Every day has its ups and downs

Ups.

• Got half of the front garden mulched while Charli has been at her Nanny and Chandie's
• Zie has figured out how to roll!! I have missed it both times as she waits until I leave the room and I return to find her flipped onto her tummy. either that or the dog is flipping her over when I turn my back.
• I have been able to write a shopping list unaided by Charli - and to clean her room so I can see the floor. I will enjoy this state of order for the next hour until she returns home and has it all messed up again by the time she goes to bed :)

Downs.

• Well actually there is only one down. But it's a biggie. Huge in fact. The University has decided they can wait no longer (and fair enough too) and I have to find another examiner to examine my thesis. I am devastated. The silver lining is that the university are so concerned about how long this is taking (and no doubt the effect this is having on my mental health!!) that they are doubling the fee to the examiner IF they can return the report in LESS THAN FOUR WEEKS. This at least is an improvment on having to wait another 8-12 weeks. However, graduation in July is a hope of the past. So I'm pretty pleased that I had scrawled all over my calendar GRADUATION WEEK on the week beginning July 16. Maybe I can find some whiteout to get rid of that. sigh

Edited to add
As soon as I walked away and opened a can of diet coke it exploded in my face. So there is another down. And as Libby will know, this 'bad' is a bit self-perpetuating according to The Secret so I should stop writing about bad things and 'attracting' even more bad things..... but then what is the fun of a blog if I can't vent :)

Happy Mother's Day

Dear Mum,
It has once again been a bittersweet day for me. With two beautiful princesses to call my own on this Mother's Day I still shed tears that you aren't here for me to spoil. I lay in bed last night, remembering all the mother's days of the past.

When I was in Grade 2 and we were all allowed to buy a gift from the stall that had been set up at school. All items were donated and cost 50c or less and you became the proud owner of a very large plastic orange serving spoon. Oh lucky you. :)

The year I purchased with my very own money (with a little help from my godparents no doubt) a tiny china plate, saucer and teacup with I Love You Mummy written on it.

And years later, when you had hinted to me that you weren't that fond of breakfast in bed so I used to get up early and go out to the kitchen and set the table and make you a pot of tea (leaf tea, none of this tea bag stuff for my mum!!) It's funny when I think about it now that I used to cook you breakfast... the only day of the year you'd eat breakfast. In all the years we lived together I never saw you eat breakfast, not even cereal, except for on Mother's Day!! The things we do for our children .... as I'm sure the coming years will teach me.

The poems I wrote. The cards I made. You treasured them all.......when I get cranky with my kids, I remember the love you always had for me and I try to be a little more patient with them. You are my hero mum, you always will be. I love you. Your grand-daughters love you. I miss you mum.

Love Carla

There is no title to describe this day.

Hello dear readers,

My feral darling child number one did not improve after her stint at Kinder Gym yesterday and so began a day of me drugging her with Calm - a naturopathic remedy that is supposed to reign in your child before they turn into the devil incarnate....... trust me..... today it did not work. In fact by 4pm I was ready to try some of the stuff myself. My thought process being that if it did not calm her, perhaps if I took it I at least would not care that she was breaking everything she touched, screaming no at every opportunity, and generally behaving in a way that would possess me to give her away should anyone be foolish enough to want her in her current mood.

Some home products for the bathroom turned up - general storage stuff that warrants assembly. Charli was very um... 'helpful' in putting it together with me and Dave arrived home in time to rescue Charli from mummy putting her into the box the goods arrived in and packing her off with the courier...... (breathe....)

My supervisor called. I have been awaiting my examiner's reports for five months now.... do you hear me people??? Five bleedin' months. I bust a gut getting this PhD done in 16 weeks, while hugely pregnant and the requisite 8 week waiting period for examination comes.... and goes... and with it, any hope of graduating in July. Today I find out two things that make this even worse.

1. The thesis office have now decided they can wait no longer. In 7 days if this examiner's report is not back, they go out to another examiner and I get to start the waiting all over again

If this is not enough to warrant tears I then get a phone call from a friend who submitted her thesis 6 weeks after me. Not only did she get both reports back today but she has no changes to make..... please don't get me wrong. I am thrilled for her. This is every PhD student's dream.... NO CHANGES..... but today of all days, I am jealous, angry, disappointed beyond description. You see we were meant to graduate together in July..... after both being enrolled for nearly 9 years we both finally submitted at the same time..... and graduation together was the final prize but alas it is not to be. I am shattered. I am drinking Baileys. I may not stop at one.

Today lots of nice things happened. I'm sure they did. I'm sure Mackenzie was blowing bubbles so hard she looked like she was rabid and foaming at the mouth. At some stage I'm sure I spotted Charli lying next to Zie holding her hand while they watched Dora together. Today I should be thankful for a loving husband, two beautiful daughters and the fact that we are all healthy. But today dear readers I don't feel like being generous, I just feel like feeling sorry for myself. Tomorrow I promise will be another day.... a better day...... a day filled with more laughter than crying....... but for tonight, a couch meant for wallowing beckons me.

Baking that carrot cake

I would like to point out to people that Charli will not eat eggs..... please note what she does with the whisk covered in raw egg!!!

Kinder Hell (I mean Gym)....

Well today started better than most - everyone slept until 7.30am and I woke up feeling refreshed - a state that I rarely awaken in anymore. We breakfasted, showered and dressed..... and we headed for the local Youth Club's kinder gym class. The first one. Our trial class. Our last class ever if there is indeed a higher power looking over us..... it was horrendous. Not because the instructors weren't good. Not because the other mums were awful or unfriendly (though by the end of the class I think a few of them did indeed sigh a sigh of relief when they realised that I had decided not to return next week). The problem? A gym full of lots of bounce-y mats, bars, ladders on walls (!!!) and a two-year old who was in no mood to be told to 'wait', that it was not yet 'her turn' or that 'you are not allowed to play on that equipment, only this equipment'.

I turned into public housing mother screaming at Charli to get down off the wall while I had Mackenzie attached to my boob and screaming with mouth full of nipple because I was not exactly being calm enough to let the milk flow. Do you have that picture in your head? I hope so because I'll carry it with me for many days. To be fair on myself I did start out calmly using the correct principles. .... giving Charli choices about either playing on the gym mats properly or hopping in the pram and going home. But when I had to feed Mackenzie... well Charlotte quickly realised that my options for disciplining her were indeed limited and unlike at home there was no bedroom to be conveniently locked in while she threw a tantrum of nuclear explosion like proportions. I had finally been given the ultimate test in parenting - a toddler tantrum in public with a baby screaming to be fed. I failed appallingly. But that's okay. I'm sure that there will be many more. Some I will handle with more aplomb. Some I am sure will be just as bad as today. I trust that there will be no permanent psychological damage - to either the toddler, the baby or myself. But one thing is very clear - there will be no more kinder gym until it becomes legal to use a long handled cattle prod to keep children under control in public.

The week in review

It's been a week like any other.... this week it's been washing clothes with some help from the girls :)



watching telly after a long and tiring day while eating ice-cream (this one was mine, charli was meant to have a bite. while she is eating this I am in the kitchen getting myself another one after Dave declares that I am unlikely to get this one back!!)

baking our first cake together. A home-made carrot cake. If I can work out how to post video (help Michelle!!) I'll post a video - very funny.



Charli in her 'mummy-made playschool-type car'..... it's pretty lame. I'll work on a better one soon.


And in true carla-style lately - a cheesecake to end the week. this one is a chocolate hazelnut one - except it has orange juice and rind in it so it turned out tasting like jaffas which doesn't really thrill me but Dave, Bekk and Matt seemed to like it. I of course am still eating it like there is no tomorrow - this pregnance weight is finding it hard to come off what with all of the cheesecake I'm eating!!! Note the piping of the cream - a much easier task after the Dora cake piping!!

An A-type Weekend

Well this weekend, like many others, was filled with 'projects'. Among these, another attempt at a cheesecake. In an attempt to mimic the last masterpiece, we again melted chocolate to 'drizzle' across the top - however, it did not drizzle, but rather 'blobbed' onto the cheesecake with such reckless abandon that we decided to smear it across instead......... then, to cover the rather un-aesthetically pleasing look of the top, Dave 'dusted' it with Quik (read, threw large amounts on top of it with the intention of shaking it off only to realise that it was a cheesecake in a springform pan and dusting it off was not really an option) - he then 'blew' it off - at which point large amounts of Quik blew straight back up into his face. I fell on the floor laughing - you had to be there I know, but it was pretty funny (and I'd had a Bailey's or 3 as all small children were out for the count!!). Anyway, here is the end result. Of course, we had forgotten how hard chocolate sets and it's now near impossible to cut a slice of this cheesecake, but we're managing somehow :)


In addition to baking, I also did a spot of gardening. After meeting Meegan at the Blackwood St markets this morning, I purchased 7 pots of herbs for $10 - what a bargain - and the garden that used to house a lemon tree before the Level 5 water restrictions claimed it's last breathe, is now housing the herbs - hopefully their root system will survive our water-deprived clay soil a little better than the citrus tree did!!



After the planting was done, I took some time out to just lie around and snap some pics of Mackenzie (see sweetheart, I DO take photos of you sometimes - pity I didn't take the time to clean the sleep out of your eyes too!!)



Hmmm, what else.... I know I did more than that. Oh well, maybe not so A-type of a weekend after all - it sure felt busy... oh yeah, that's right, I also spread nearly 2 cubic metres of mulch on the gardens... and I have the sore muscles to prove it. Night!!

Charli (aka Dora) to the rescue

Picture it: Charli is playing in the backyard with a skipping rope. About 20 noisy miner birds start harassing a baby butcher bird (not that I feel much pity as these birds are usually the aggressors).... they are making a hell of a racket and when Charli asks what the noise is I say that the birds are just playing. Surprisingly she doesn't believe me and pretends to tie one end of her skipping rope around her waist harness style while holding the other end up in the air and screaming "I'm tumming, bird, I'm tumming....wait". I could barely dial the phone to call her dad I was laughing so hard. Where are those video cameras when you need them :)

We did it!!

The Pre-Party Preparations.

Well I'd been thinking about Charli's Dora the Explorer second birthday party for many many weeks. In reality however I left most preparations until the second to last moment and spent a couple of nights waking at 3am wondering how I was going to design the maps or more importantly, what the hell I was going to put on the maps, and how all of this was going to happen in the next three days with Charli not finding out what I was doing ....... I'm not going to explain here the whole concept of Dora and Boots and their adventures. If you are clueless and would like to be clued.... feel free to visit the Dora site at the Nick Jr website.

Needless to say, my most amazingly creative sister-in-law Bekk - who is stuck in Mt Isa working at the moment and therefore has many an hour to spend on such tasks given the questionable venues she has to choose from at which to socialise - offered (silly girl) to make some backpacks up for the kids from purple felt. I was quick to take up her offer and here's how they turned out.



Unfortunately this little guy seems to have lost an eye - rest assured they were not made like this - Bekk was not willingly scarring small children for life by presenting them with one-eyed backpacks!!! All of this creativity achieved with a sewing machine that was not available until the night before the party and then went on the fritz with three backpacks to go!! Thank you so much Bekk!!

The Dora Hunt

Well the kids arrived and after trying to keep about 7 kids under the age of 3 penned up in the lounge room until everyone arrived we decided to get started without a couple of them. Backpacks were distributed - much to Henry's delight who was a bit put out that all the presents were for Charli Girl (and rightly so Henry!!) Kids were asked to pull out their maps



Of course the concept was lost a little on children who were not yet literate, however, the first stop was the big blue river (a tarp in the front yard) and all the kids had to look in their backpacks for their skipping ropes so that we could make a rope bridge and cross the river (lame I know but I couldn't think of anything else at the last moment because of course I had not scripted this day - as if it would go to plan with 9 two-year olds in tow!!.... yes 9!!! so much for the rule of inviting one more than the child's age to their parties.... I read that little parenting tip after the invites had all gone out ha ha).

Next stop was Quicksand Cave - something we'd put a little more effort into - our carport decorated with purple plastic walls and sand on the floor.



The kids were told that they were not allowed to touch the sand or they would sink. I potentially have instilled a beach phobia into every attending child. Years from now on the psychologist's couch they will tell of a Dora party at which for some inexplicable reason one of the parents made them afraid of sand!! They lept across the numbered 'rocks' to make it safely to the other side.

Once through the other 'wall' and it was onto the stop 3 - the Pinata Party. Of course the first thing they spied as they ran towards the backyard was a 2-ft high stuffed Dora sitting on a set of swings and the squeals of delight and shouts of 'party' (say it like the karate kid says 'bonsai') as they raced down the hill were priceless. I do hope that part was captured on video.

The Pinata

Once in the backyard I found myself standing alone at the Dora pinata asking everyone where the pinata was before someone pointed out that they probably didn't even know what a pinata was. Stupid kids!! So I dragged them all off the swings and made them come over to the pinata - because you know, this party was not about them having fun - it was about them following the bloody map that my husband had lovingly printed and laminated!! So get your bums over here kids!! :)




Each child took hold of a ribbon and 'pulled pulled pulled' until finally I stuck my hand up Dora's backside and pulled out the bottom of it myself - to the squeals of delight as children were rained with packets of dinosaur jubes and little toy whistles (disclaimer: parents were advised that after Dave had shoved a whistle in his mouth we had ascertained that they were not a choking hazard however all parents were responsible for their own children and whatever objects that may be put inside said child's mouth).

The Cake

Despite my godmother insisting that the Dora Cake looked like the Lion King (!! what the?? LOL) I would like to think that given

1. this was my first attempt ever at piping a cake,
   
2. it took over 10 colours (!!) and
   
3. I had to wait until all children had gone to bed which meant that I was icing this bloody thing at 9.30 on the Friday night

well I think it worked out rather well. I can't take full credit though. When Dave entered the kitchen with me close to tears, pouring a baileys and declaring that Dora was just going to have to be iced all in one colour and that I didn't give a crap anymore.... well he leaped to my rescue and got me started by doing all the fiddly black and brown outline piping...... I felt more enthused after that. So hats off to Dave or else this.....



may have looked like one large blue blob with a few sprinkles scattered over it. It was made all worth it when Charli recognised who it was. Of course I will admit to holding her down and asking about 10 times "who is it Charli?" before the survivalist in her must have realised that she was not getting any of that yummy looking cake until she'd given me the answer I was after..... she whispered "Dora", I beamed and then whisked the cake up stairs to cut it (much to the chagrin of all the drooling children). Charli seemed to like it.....


This unfortunately is probably also the only shot I got of the lovely birthday outfit that Aunty Libby bought for her months ago - well she didn't specifically buy it for her to wear at her birthday but it looked like something Dora might wear to a mexican fiesta!!

Post-party Blues

So everyone left and Dave, Charlotte, Mackenzie and I just hung in the backyard for awhile waiting for Charli to get tired...... we waited... and we waited..... and we waited....... Dave was approaching drunk on the beer he was consuming and had I not been breastfeeding I would have been close behind him...... finally at about 2.30pm we got both girls to sleep and instead of also sleeping we sat in the backyard and reminisced about the last two years. Charli finally woke up about 4pm and spent the next 2.5 hours alternating between sobbing and just plain crying. Those post-party blues can be a real bitch sometimes. We hoped for an early night......

..... but it was not to be. Well not for me and the girls at least :)

A girl's night in

Lying around on our bed at 7pm with the girls, Dave looked dead on his feet and so I stupidly suggested he go to bed as it was Charli's bedtime anyway and as soon as I had her and Zie settled I'd be right in there with him......he barely managed to say "i'll just have a nap" before the snoring began. By 8pm I knew that there was no way Charli was going to sleep - despite being tucked in with her Dora figurines from Samuel (thanks Sam!!)



I'd been into her room 4 times and finally made a deal with her. She could come out and watch telly but we were watching what I wanted to watch. I compromised. I wanted to watch a chick flick. Charli, as always, wanted to watch Dora. So we put on The Shaggy Dog with Tim Allen and she lay with me and watched the entire 2 hour feature length film - and it wasn't even animated. Of course I had to get a running commentary about the dog's antics the entire movie - and how you explain genetic modification to a two-year old I'll never know. She wanted to know what the pug dog crossed with the cane toad was - well I lied and said it was a funny looking frog. She seemed happy enough with that and I suspect she knew that if she pushed the point she would be sent to bed before the exciting conclusion to this movie. At 9.30pm she declared she was tired and she wandered off to bed. All in all a good day, though one that went on a little longer than I'd hoped. She sure does know how to milk a birthday party for all it's worth doesn't she??

Happy Birthday our darling sweetheart - your Nanna is watching over you for many more birthdays to come. We all love you. xoxox

Two years ago tonight....

I was sitting at the computer on a pregnancy website asking the girls there whether cramping meant that I could be in labour..... 5 and a half hours from now two years ago I went into labour. 10 hours and 17 minutes from now two years ago our lives were changed forever when our beautiful girl Charlotte was born. You have brought so much to our lives little girl. Each and every day you make me laugh - even on those days when I am so tired I could cry. I saw you today swinging on a 'big girl swing' - back and forth you swung your legs making yourself go higher and higher. Somehow I blinked and you grew up. Happy Birthday for tomorrow little girl. Your Daddy and I love you very much. xoxox

A little something to look forward to

Well dear readers, this coming September my lovely husband and I will have survived 5 years of marriage. Add to this the fact that the last 5 years have included a PhD, full-time study for Dave, family health problems, and two small children entering our lives and thus making alone time all but impossible - and I bit the bullet today and booked us in for two nights here for our anniversary. If you click on the accommodation link you'll see the luxurious lagoon suite which will be our home for two nights. And there will be a couples massage package at the day spa complete with champagne and cheese platter afterwards. Our package includes dinner each night, breakfast each day, and a bottle of champagne daily - clearly I am going to be drunk the whole time. Counting down the days until these two days of bliss will be ours - and I'm sure that we will only discuss the children for 40 of those 48 hours away.

Toesday bloody Toesday

Like Sunday Bloody Sunday, except on a Tuesday - and of my toe - and the blood was more of the internal bruising kind and less of the kind where 26 civil rights protesters were shot dead in Northern Ireland. So really my incident with my toe is really nothing like it, but here's what happened nonetheless. But first - why am I blogging about my toe? Many many posts ago, Beck started Toesday - I can't remember when, sorry you'll have to find the post yourself - it will give you a chance to read all of her posts - go on, it's worth it :)

Anyway, I've never posted a photo of my toes - though I did post a gorgeous one of Charli and her daddy and their toes many moons ago now when she was only 6 weeks old. But I don't like my feet and they are usually not for public viewing. But my unsightly feet have just been made worse by slamming the little toe of my left foot into a bedside table (and no I was not drunk worse luck - I felt every spine chilling crack in my little toe as it happened). It swelled immediately. Today it looks like this....

It feels worse than it looks. And don't think I haven't complained endlessly about this since it happened....and made Dave look at it 1000 times since yesterday........ he did exactly the same thing last week - I kid you not EXACTLY THE SAME THING except on a different piece of furniture. And he had previously broken his toe so it probably hurt more. AND Charli threw herself on his foot after he'd just hurt it. But he complained not once. What a trooper. I on the other hand will be milking this for all that it's worth. Because that's just the kind of gal I am :)

(p.s. and the photo is out of focus because of the excrutiating pain I am in .... or just because I am a crap photographer)

A bit of DIY

Well I often lament that I don't have very good craft skills. People such as Beck have more craft in her little finger than I have in my whole body. But when it comes to larger projects that are home oriented and a bit more blokey then I'm not too bad. I've been known to make my own flyscreens for rental properties that allowed waay too many bugs in for my liking. And my latest project is to transform these chairs. Here is a before shot:



Four chairs and solid pine table were my mum's and she had re-upholstered the chairs in this fabric to match our new corner lounge as the tables and chairs were in her dining room. However, since the table and chairs are now in our eat-in kitchen being used and abused by a toddler who is none too careful with her food...... well if you look very closely you would see remnants of spaghetti, playdough, weetbix and the stray piece of mushed up corn...... I needed wipable chair coverings!!

So off to spotlight I went in search of upholstery grade vinyl, a staple gun, some upholstery tacks, and calico. Then it was off to Clark Rubber for some new foam padding. Home again and the maddening task of removing tacks and staples from the bases began......4 weeks later - maddeningly trying to get this done with Charli asleep as her DIY skills are still being developed ;) and this is the end result.......



I won't be winning any upholstery awards but it suits our purposes.

Little susie homemaker

With the PhD still awaiting comment and me starting to almost feel on top of motherhood with two under two - I am back to baking. This.....




was presented to Michelle today when she came to visit. A white chocolate cheesecake. I believe her words were "bloomin' bloody wonderful" - and it was if I do say so myself.

Number of photos not equal to amount of love

My dearest Mackenzie,
I have been thinking about writing this for many weeks now. You just turned 3 months last weekend while we were on holidays with Meegan and Sharon and their brood and I realised that although it was your first beach holiday I failed to actually take any photos of you at the beach. This lack of photos is also I'm afraid carried over to your home life and I have been remiss in taking as many photos of you as I took of Charli when she was your age. But I must explain why. Some of it as you will come to understand should you ever have children of your own one day is due to a simple time issue. I no longer have any. I no longer have the luxury of standing above your cot as you sleep and taking 20 photos of every minute little change in facial expression in a three minute period. However, some of the reason for the paucity of photos is merely because with time, I've come to understand that so much more enjoyment can be gleaned from actually experiencing moments with your children rather than madly attempting to capture them on film. You will therefore see that I've taken less photos of Charli as she's gotten older as well. Why? Because I now sit and marvel at her antics each and every day rather than trying to video them. Similarly, I find myself propping you up on my legs and just 'talking' to you for ages. Listening to your gurgles and attempts to 'talk' to me. I love it. And I dont' want to miss a minute of your smiles by racing for the camera. But I promise to take at least some photos each month - you know, so you know that you weren't adopted at age 7 or anything :)

Love Mummy

I brought reality with me....

This won't be a long post about the weekend away with Meegan and Shaz as to be honest I'm still recovering. Three adults, four toddlers and a 10 year old....... relaxing weekend away? Hardly :)
Still I do want to thank the girls for coming away with me and letting me see just how possible (or not as the case may be) it would be to holiday with the girls on a regular basis while they are still this young. Mostly the conversation that sticks in my mind is one I had with a gent in the lifts while loading all my stuff back into the car on Sunday morning. He said to me:

"It'll be hard to get back to reality tomorrow won't it?" Smiles.

I had Charli in my arms (as she wouldn't be put down) and was trying to steer a trolley full of the monumental load of crap that you have to take away with you when you holiday with two small children. I knew that Mackenzie was back in the unit screeching for a feed.

"Um, I brought reality with me."

He smiles sympathetically as he leaves the lift and says "yeah, been there, done that - it'll all be over some day".

Despite the stress that was this weekend I realise that I hope it won't all be over too soon. I'm not ready for them to leave the nest anytime soon. I love you princesses xoxox

One of those days...

Well dear readers it's been one of those days. And it's now nearly 9.30pm and I'm tired so this is going to be the reader's digest version.

Today the wardrobe man was coming so that we could finally have a grown up bedroom and not one that looks like two 19-year olds are sharing a college dorm room.

The weather forecast is 34 and humid.

I ring the wardrobe company and they are not due until 12.30pm - right when Charli will be due for her sleep.

At about 9.30am we're watching TV, I have 2 air-conditioners on and I throw a load of laundry in the dryer because I'm a lazy housewife who couldn't be jacked going downstairs into the hot day to hang the washing out.

I'm feeding Zie and she lets loose with a bottom burp to end all bottom burps and when I stand up I have baby excrement running down my legs onto the brand new turkish rug.

I call to Charli to get me the baby's sheet (i.e. wrap) and bring it to me. Charli looks at me with her new look "I know what you're asking me to do but you know, I just don't feel assed doing that for you right now".... I bribe her with something - it may have been an ice-block, I don't recall. She finally finds it in her heart to bring me the wrap so I can wipe up the mess rather than traipsing it through the house.

As I'm changing Zie's nappy, the stereo/TV goes BANG and I lose power - bloody hell - too many appliances, I've blown a damn fuse again. Now I'm becoming fairly accomplished at fuse changing so I head downstairs with a teatowel to take out the fuse....but then I realise that the computers have gone off - and that can't be right as they are on a separate fuse thingy...... I check the fuse and sure enough it's still intact. Hmmmm. Go upstairs, turn on the lights (again a separate fuse box) - nothing. At this point I call my neighbour (their car is there) but she does not answer and I suspect she is in labour (she is overdue to have her baby at this point).... so I leave a message saying I've lost power and am wondering if they have to. I don't hear back... which is fair enough :)
I call our neighbours over the road - and guess what? They have power.

I call energex. They are not aware of an outage in Mitchelton and they log a call to the service men.

My baby is screaming because it's hot and my toddler wants to play hot games such as pretend mummy is a horse-y and mummy let's jump up and down in this bleedingly hot weather!!

Energex arrive - the power box on the pole has totally shat itself and they log another call for a bucket truck to come out and replace it. this will be another 1.5 hours or so.

We are now melting in the heat.

I call the wardrobe company to check that any power tools they require are battery/rechargeable. They are not. They will have to cancel my wardrobe and come another day. This is not an option as far as I'm concerned as things are stacked against every wall and we can't move for the crap that is waiting to find its new home in the new wardrobe. Plus I've been waiting 5 weeks for this wardrobe. They suggest we could run an extension cord to my neighbour's house. I am reluctant to call the possibly laboring woman to ask if I can use their power (as it turns out she was labouring - or had already labored - they were up at the hospital having left their car at home and are now the proud owners of a new baby boy!!!)..... I hope that their laundry downstairs is unlocked and take it upon myself to okay this suggestion to use the neighbour's power. I run next door once I'm off the phone, extension lead in hand and plug into their laundry.... I am yet to tell them that I've stolen electricity from them but know they won't mind :)

The wardrobe man turns up and starts using power drills. My now hot and bothered baby is still screaming and my toddler, upon hearing the drills, totally loses it and also wants 'up' in mummy's arms... lord. After 10 minutes playing in the back yard energex come back and fix the electricity and finally I can ramp up the aircon, seat Charli in front of the telly, and set about cooling and calming the baby........ Having had no nap, Charli falls asleep in front of the telly jsut as the wardrobe guy is finishing up.....she looks adorable and I reluctantly let her stay on the lounge - knowing this will result in a less than long sleep but she looked so nice and cool.

So, wardrobe is installed. Electricity is back on. Toddler is asleep. Baby is calmer. All I needed at that point was stiff drink - something I indulged in later that day at Sharon's after my incredibly over-tired toddler screamed 'car' more than 50 times before I decided it was just best to take her for a drive rather than hear her incessant whinging.......

I just love these days when you are sorry that you ever tumbled out of bed in the first place - and speaking of bed..... Night.

Politically correct eskimos boost blog readership

Well how's this? I check my statcounter for recent visitor activity, because that's the kind of narcissistic gal I am :) and I find that someone in Boston Mass in the USA has been to my blog. I visit the link to see where they were directed from and lo and behold it's a google search. Apparently my post that mentioned that we should refer to eskimos in the more politically correct way 'inuit' came up sixth in a google search of 'eskimo politically correct' - how funny is that? Bet that person - no doubt researching something for school - was bitterly disappointed that I was unable to provide them with more useful information.

SPAM with manners

It's nice to see that if my inbox is going to be inundated with SPAM that it is at least polite spam. Today in my inbox I received a message telling me that a message that I had tried to send had failed. I hadn't actually sent a message to this recipient - it's one of those spams that say you've sent email even when you haven't. But don't you just love the politeness of the message?

Hi. This is the qmail-send program at rs1.inst.or.jp.
I'm afraid I wasn't able to deliver your message to the following addresses.
This is a permanent error; I've given up. Sorry it didn't work out.

And I think anyone trying to end a relationship could take some good advice from this email. Simple yet to the point. "I'm afraid this relationship is not going to work out. This is a permanent error. I've given up. Sorry it didn't work out". There's no ambiguity there is there? LOL

But Rembrandt was not afraid of baths

Or at least I am going to assume that he was not. And that is why painting would have been so much more enjoyable for him. Or at least his mother. Not that his mother was probably still bathing him when he was an artist..... but who knows, those artsy types can be weird :)

Anyway, the point of all of this is that today I decided to let Charli loose with some poster paints and her art easel. Partly because I wanted to paint her toy oven and thought that it was only fair that she too be allowed to paint, and partly because I feel that I've been a little remiss in not allowing my nearly 2 year old to discover the joys of painting. I was wrong. She should not have been allowed to play with paints until she was also old enough to date - and if her father has anything to do with that then we are talking at least another 20 or 30 years!!

So here is the artiste herself....



Though more paint seemed to end up on her than the easel...


And here is where the problems really began. See all the paint in her hair...??



It is at this point that I realise that wiping a wet washer over her to clean her up is no longer an option. A bath is called for....with hair washing......and much scrubbing. Which leads me to suddenly remember that as of a week ago my child is terrified of baths (or showers in case that was going to be your suggestion). And when you throw 'hair washing' into the equation, well toss me a valium and pour me a vodka because our house is about to become filled with screams of terror that rival those heard in any funhouse carnival across the country. My heart sinks as I realise that the bath is inevitable....... its that or let her stay on the back porch painting forever but somehow that doesn't seem feasible.

So into the bath we go. The screaming begins. Shampoo is added to the equation and the screaming ramps up a notch. Normally I try and gently wash the shampoo from her head but by now she's thrashing so much and has managed to get paint and shampoo into her eyes and the screeching is doing my head in... I realise that if it's going to be this painful it may as well be fast and painful so I do something that will speed up the process but was also guaranteed to send her into a frenzied panic (and I was not disappointed). I turned on the shower. To my shock and surprise, when presented with enough motivation, my two year old can flip herself out of the bath onto the floor...... of course I had the shower hose in my hand so when i turned to try and catch her, water flew everywhere and there was no option at this point except to throw myself into the shower (fully clothed) with her and just hose her down. My ears are still bleeding from the noise!

So there you go - art time at our place ended with a toddler sobbing in her bed and a mummy desperately wishing that it was not too early to start drinking at 10am (that is too early right?). Let's hope Dave appreciates the masterpiece she did him.